Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
