I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
