Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
