five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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