I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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