he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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