no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
