Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize