At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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