we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
My pussy is not your playground.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
