Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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