There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
