good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize