I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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