About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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