Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
