its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize