One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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