i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
