I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
