omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
