I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
