Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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