It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
You were trust falling into bushes
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize