Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
