He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Randomize