We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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