He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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