you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
