He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i will never coherently bang her
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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