who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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