So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
