Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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