so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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