He asked to "fluff my boner.."
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
