Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
