i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
