yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I have demons in me.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
