I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
