She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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