It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize