I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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