i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It's shark week go big or go home
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
