She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
