I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
