the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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