I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
wow bdsm is so cute
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize