just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize