i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I wish i was in the wii world.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
