have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
