i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
