(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
